Category Archives: Seasonal Haiku

Seasonal Haiku: Spring doldrums

Unseasoned, but strong
My armor knows but one kink:
Good hair gel’s pricey.

-Jimmy Clausen

Time returns, wounds heal…
Hah! Next year, your kick returns?
Filed in triplicate.

-Myles Brand

Even four three five
Won’t help you with chloroform
I shall come at night.

-Chan Gailey

QBs turn diamond
Underneath my pressured gaze
Know a good ice guy?

-Dennis Erickson

I bring discipline
Honor, pride and success, too
Plus, army fatigues.

-Randy Shannon

Hail, Persephone!
Thy feet herald our spring game
P.S., I may run.

-Pat White

Late frost burns the bloom
Would a fool not let Springdale
Go fuck its damn self?

-Houston Nutt*

*if you can recognize the haiku this is based on, Mitch Mustain will transfer to your school

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Filed under ACC, Big East, Notre Dame, Pac-10, Seasonal Haiku, SEC

Seasonal Haiku: Post-bowl, pre-NLOI Day

I’m not the first to do a college football related haiku. There have been many, many others. I’m just the worst.

*****

It’s easy as pie
Ma Teresa would leave, too
I’m gonna get paid
Adrian Peterson

Barely beat Wofford
And Augusta still no-go
Time for new visor?
Steve Spurrier

Hot damn, beat ‘SC
It’s contract extension time
Cue seven more L’s
Karl Dorrell

Good season, Satan
Planning almost completed
Last thing: Jade Monkey
Myles Brand

RoJo to Gainesville?
The ledge is cold but soothing
Go Big Blue swan dive!
My Michigan friend

4 Comments

Filed under Big Ten, Big XII, NCAA, Pac-10, Seasonal Haiku, SEC, USC