A belated happy anniversary to/for/with me

My original blog went up in the first week of April 2006. We are currently in the second week of April 2007. Here’s a bouquet of flowers I picked from the neighbor’s garden.

At first I went with items about my personal life, random news stories, etc. You know, crap no one wanted to read. The first time I got a significant amount of hits came with an extended Charlie the Hutt metaphor. It dawned on me that, as I would mention later…

This once again proves two things:

1) Notre Dame sucks, and anytime you point that out you’re gonna get high-fives.

2) It is extremely difficult adapting Huttese to a college football fake news article, but it’s also extremely worth it.

It might also have helped that I posted links on several college football message boards, a known breeding ground for the most rabid, click happy huddled masses outside of conspiracy theorist slashdotters.

Thank you, faithful readers! Our long national two day year old nightmare of never making it into wordpress.com’s Friday, April 7 2006’s Hottest Blogs’ top twenty is finally over!

Thus my focus became college football, and those rabid, click happy huddled masses have done me well since then. By done me well, I mean that they’ve bombarded me with poorly typed physical threats, questions about getting them in contact with Reggie Bush to see if he wants to buy http://www.ReggieBush25.com, comments about my hygiene, polemics about morality and the lack thereof in my Hell-bound flesh, and general disgruntlement regarding Mark Richt’s proven love of rumps and rump accessories.

Also, a number of entities, organizations and sundry of escalating shadiness and/or legitimacy have asked me to write for them, each of them using variations on “do it for free” to entice me into their world of reduced expectations and shattered dreams, and when that didn’t do the trick they sprayed themselves with Axe and rubbed their bloated capitalistic hands on my thighs. Which is very flattering. So I’ve got that going for me.

Mainly, though, this blogging thing has been a welcome relief and a daily reminder that putting out any product at all is better than whinging my way through another crappy puff piece in the local rags, bemoaning Bill Plaschke and his one.

Sentence.

Per.

Paragraph.

Modus operandi, which isn’t that bad, actually. Those who can, write. Those who can’t, write. So at least I’m writing.

USC football will open up the 2007 season as the top ranked team in the nation, which is how it should be. I won’t be at the Coliseum for any of the games, however. I’m driving a car across the country to take in a game in at least 14 different stadiums during the fall of 2007. I will be on the road for the entirety of what could be a national championship season. That I’ll be missing USC games is the only bad part of this deal; that I’m going at all is due, in large part, to the many people I’ve met online whose maniacal obsession with college football has made me less shameful of my own delusions and misallocated priorities. That’s a thank you, by the way.

And thank you to Notre Dame football, the teat from which even the least creative of us may suck. My dearest Fightin’ Irish: you are the echoes that keep on giving.

That’s right, Charlie. Everyone wants a piece of you and your FUPA – even disembodied arms can’t get enough.